Smile Like You Mean It.

I had my first session with my hypno/pyscho therapist on Tuesday lunchtime. I wasn't hypnotherapied this time, my therapist merely wanted to get some background info on me. So I sat there while I was ask all manner of questions about my childhood and how I felt about what had happened during that time. It was an interesting exercise because although I had been thinking about how my childhood had affected my later life quite a bit over the last months it was quite cathartic to actually say it out loud.

Apparently I am pretty self aware, which I suppose gives me a head start. And although it will be hard work trying to raise my self-esteem and therefore putting an end to this anxiety and depression I have been experiencing, I am prepared to do the work. What's more I was given homework to do this week. Not only have I got to smile at people all the time instead of walking round with me head down I also have to ring three people this week for a chat (something I always put off because I don't want to impose on people and because I think they wouldn't possibly want to talk to me), I am to e-mail three people (something I'm better at) and I've got to talk to random people too, (in shops etc). So if you are accosted by a bloke with a stick in Tesco's who is rambling on about what a nice day it is have a heart and be nice. It might be me.

I was supposed to start today at the Health Spa I went to (I don't normally go to Health Spa's you understand, it was a birthday pressie from my sister and some friends). Supposedly I was to chat to people in the restaurant at lunchtime (I was the only one in there) and also chat to people in the various pools, steam rooms etc. I didn't do very well really. I found the whole place a bit scary really. I didn't feel comfortable about jumping in a hot tub with someone (and most of the people there were women) and starting chatting. Other people seemed to have no problem (but they were all there with someone else) but being there on my own I didn't want to invade peoples space and relaxation time.

Still it was my first day and it can only get better. With your permission I'll be recording my therapy sessions on this blog. I'm of the opinion that it will be beneficial to write my progress down as I go, and comitting it to the interwebnet will make me do it.

I tell you one thing about health spa's though. Them steam rooms don't half make you sweat;-)