Look Into My Eyes, You're Getting Very Sleepy.
After another bout of increased anxiety, which has made me feel pretty shit agian for the last two weeks I have decided to be proactive about some treatment. I have got a referral to a local counselling service via my GP, which I attended last year without a great deal of success, but the wait is at least 8 weeks. Last year it took nearly 6 months to get an appointment and their treatment was group therapy which I found to be no use at all. When I asked for further treatment (which I would have had to pay for) the clinic advised me that there would be a wait and that they would contact me. As you've probably already guessed they never did.
This time I know that another 2 or 3 month wait will do me no good at all, so I rang a psychotherapist last week and went along for a free initial consultation on Friday. The lady was very nice and easy to talk to. She practices both psyhoanalysis and hypnotherapy and has said that she will combine the two. I have never been under hypnosis before and it is a bit scary but apparently hypnosis taps into the subconcious and can be very successful. I am self aware enough to know that my anxiety and low self esteem stem from my childhood and that taking the drugs and trying to put on a brave face will not make me feel better. I have been told that I will have a few bad weeks when the stuff I'm talking about will make me feel really down, but I am prepared to go for it. It will be expensive and could take a while (there is no instant cure for psychological problems), but if it works then it shall be worth it. Just feeling confident again and waking up in the morning not feeling like I've had a nightmare will be fabulous.
I hope everyone has a great Christmas and Santa brings everyone lots of lovely presents. Thanks to everyone who has sent supportive e-mails to me throughout the year and to anyone else who has taken the time to read my blog.
Cheers, I really appreciate it.